Wii Sports to replace 2020 Olympics as gamers answer their countries’ call! – Liberal Article
Due to the unfortunate events of 2020, the Olympic games has been cancelled. However, the International Olympics Committee has a solution. They will replace each event with a similar version from Wii Sports, Wii Sports Resort and Mario & Sonic at the Olympics Games.
The response to this decision has been heartwarming. Usain Bolt has considered coming out of retirement, promising he can break his own record as long as he plays as Princess Peach. Tom Cruise is reported to be the competing in the high jump for the USA, whilst Boris Johnson has also been tapped to captain the men’s 7’s rugby team. The Prime Minister’s call comes after his previous impressive performances against Japanese rugby sides. I believe however, cycling is a must-do for the PM.
Personally, I think Dianne Abbott should lead the basketball team. She has already bragged about her impressive five pointers. Michael Gove seems like the standout choice for leading the baseball side. The white lines could bring back some pleasant youthful memories. I did have high hopes for Nigel Farage leading our rhythmic gymnastics team, but unfortunately, he has joined his wife and will be competing for Germany. Jo Swinson has already been ruled out after attempting the 100m dash as Doctor Eggman, but trailed at the back of the group, seemingly completely lost with little direction.
My only worry is the UK’s wifi connection. BT are worried that they will not be able to establish the appropriate speeds for the UK to perform to a high level. Any lag or glitches must be solved beforehand. I suggest a pre-season with the whole of the country should be a priority to get this issue sorted. We will not only test BT but also give all British citizens a chance to represent their country. My Wii bowling skills must not be wasted in such a testing time for the UK, beer is recommended to help zone in your skills.
My other concern is, of course, the virus! I do not want to see the nation’s Wii’s infected with virus’s and not be ready for action. New cheats and methods could be used at any moment. Most are worried about Huawei and leaks suggesting they may sabotage the UK’s wifi to win. Russia as well has been reported to be E-doping, which may see them being banned from the Olympics.
To be honest, I think this is a great opportunity for the world to come together in such a hard time. I believe Nintendo will be up to the challenge of supplying every country with the required hardware. The International Olympics Committee have made a fantastic decision and I can’t wait for Britain to shine this year in the first E-lympics!
Written by Chief Liberal writer, Max Anderson
Point of Information
Why limit ourselves to Wii games for the Olympics – a Labour response
In all honesty, I would not be completely against this idea. Formula One racing had a similar idea this past weekend. The tragically cancelled Australian Grand Prix was replaced with a just as good virtual “Not the AUS GP” hosted by Veloce Esports. It was great to see the drivers still in high spirits, and it even rose to become Sunday’s most-watched stream on Twitch.
Obviously we should not be limited to just Wii Sports. I feel like Judo, Taekwondo, and Karate would be much better served by a few rounds on Smash Bros. The shooting competitions should obviously be transferred to Call of Duty’s new battle royale mode: Warzone. There may be a few slight differences but the fundamentals are the same. Point at target, shoot at target.
As the lockdown extends from weeks into months, people are going to start getting even more bored and irritable than they already are. We are going to need something to argue about harmlessly and sports is normally that release. We might not even make it to summer. My Twitter feed need something to argue about, so Boris needs to get the Premier League playing FIFA 2020, pronto.
Written by Labour writer, Daniel Orchard
A less than Conservative response – a Conservative response
Dust off those old consoles from the early Noughties and get ready to hop, bop and spin around your front living rooms. That’s what it will take if you want to get your name in the hat to represent Team GB.
This could be a stroke of genius from the International Olympics committee. To get everyone keeping fit and keeping them from exercising out and about. While Wii Fitness could be mistaken for finding out and highlighting people’s faults, I believe its actually the solution to all our problems! People don’t need to go running in the park fearful of people who don’t respect the distancing rules. Additionally, those who have already succumbed to being couch potatoes can waggle their wrist to their heart’s content on Wii Sports Tennis.
The point is, hope is not totally lost… Talking seriously now, there is cause for optimism. There are fitness sites as well as notable individuals who are putting up classes, giving out advice and tips/ tricks on the daily. SO if you are genuinely praying for something to happen like the E-lympics, then get online and find a challenge you can do against your friends. I’m using Strava to see how I fare compared to my university mates!
Written by Conservative writer, Joshua Tyrrell
From everyone here at Point of Information, we wish you a happy Aprils Fools day. We hope that you are staying safe, and this has made you smile in such a testing time.